programs gym photos nutrition videos

A Wild Weekend in Victoria: From a Badass Competition to a Fetish Convention

image Arriving at CrossFit Taranis, one of the first things I did was check what time my first heat started. I was in the 9th heat. My start time: 10:36 am. Not only was my first heat time posted, but the start times for every single heat for all four workouts of the entire competition were listed, down to the exact minute. My last WOD was set for 6:06 pm. I'm not going to lie, I kind of thought they were being unrealistically ambitious, and perhaps a bit cocky, with the precision of their start times. 'It's going to be a long day,' I thought to myself. 'If my last heat is supposed to start just after 6 pm, realistically they'll fall two hours behind like most competitions and we'll be competing until 9 pm tonight. Is the liquor store even going to be open by the time we get out of here?' But as the day progressed, they stayed on schedule. I looked at the clock right before I started my last workout. 6:06 pm. These guys in Taranis have their shit together. From beginning to end, the entire competition was tickety boo, right on time, like clock work! Hats off to them. I’ve organized events before, so I can appreciate how difficult it is to stay on track. We definitely can learn something from this at our school. Don't get me wrong, I love how we're so deeply based on love and passion, how we're about 'vibing it out' when the time feels right. Yes, CrossFit Van is run just like Patty's social life: "Just one warm-up scotch and then we'll start making dinner. Just a little warm-up drink. It's too early to start the steaks yet," says Patty at 10 pm. Metaphorically speaking, at CrossFit Van, dinner is usually served just before midnight. This is part of the charm of our community, but I have to say as an athlete competing, I definitely appreciate the organization I witnessed on the weekend. It allowed us to rest and eat, hydrate and get massaged at appropriate times. Once again, huge props to CrossFit Taranis! There's something special about that gym - you could feel the atmosphere the second you walked into their box. Onto us: there's something special about our little group, as well. Such a good time, so many laughs. And it was a weekend of notable firsts: 5. First time Bradleah 'Pinky,' and the sexiest twins in Vancouver, Cam and Kieran, competed in a CrossFit competition!!! Nice work guys! 4. First time the Brown Owl was beaten by the double under, literally and figuratively. (Don't worry, Brown Owl. Both Rhea and I know how you feel). The slash marks left on her body made the Brown Owl look like she took part in the Gag Ball Fetish Convention that was roaring at our hotel all weekend. But unlike most of those fish-net clad, leather dress wearing girls, who were literally leashed up to much older men (I kid you not!), the ones Lars said were “hard sixes and soft sevens,” Brown Owl, you’re a hard nine and a half. 3. First time Eunice tried the NO XPLODE. Thanks Poker – after having been called a Spinster after my lacklustre performance during our night out in Seattle, it allowed me to have enough staying power to actually make it past 11 pm on Saturday night! 2. First time the Big Baby was successfully able to tell the twins apart. "I learned something this weekend. That there...," Big Baby said as he pointed to Kieran, "That right there is 100% unmistakably Kieran!" 1. First time Rhea ate a grain of any kind in more than a year. On her slice of pizza: "Did it make you feel sick?" I asked. "No, it was so delicious. It felt right, you know?" said Rhea. And, of course, there were some familiar situations this weekend, as well. 5. As usual, and like a true monk, Andy bypassed taking part in any of the prolific facebook messages that went on prior to the trip as we tried to organize the weekend. “Like a true monk, Andy rarely answers texts,” said Lars. 4. As usual, Poker, who really doesn’t need extra energy, got high on NO Xplode during the competition, chugging a concentrated solution of the potent drink between every WOD. No wonder he never sleeps. 3. As usual, Lars ‘Mr. I Sit Around All Day Drafting Quality One Liners’ Konge was like a 14-year-old girl updating his facebook status every minute on the minute. 2. As usual, Pete wasn't the most organized Irishman in the history of the world, forgetting his O-lifting shoes and cleverly forgetting to bring any food to the competition. 1. As usual, Bradleah had to aggressively tend to her half-passing out Ginger Monkey, ushering him out of the party early and putting him lovingly to bed. Great weekend, Gang. I love you more with each passing day.